My Expectant Heart

Right now I'm in between.

Literally, I'm in between students' sessions. I'm in between breakfast and lunch. The hungriest part of my day. I'm in between mental activities. Meaning, not vegging out watching TV, and not full tilt, mediating an educational therapy session. Blogging is in between. I'm in between on whether or not I like listening to talk radio on the way to work. I'm leaning toward NOT liking it, as it's a pretty whiney way to start my day. I'm in between carrying my son in my womb and carrying him in my arms.

I have about 59 days left before he's due. I still have much to do. I'm thrilled that we have a few baby showers coming up. The crib is put together. It's harder to lift my belly out of bed in the mornings. My waddle is more pronounced. My heart is waiting.

The unanswered questions are quieter now. "What does he look like?" "How will I react?" "Will he be fussy or content?"

I feel quieter, more contemplative. Without being melodramatic or self-righteous (please hear my heart), I am savoring the intimate communion with just my King and me. I know that my thoughts and priorities are about to dramatically change in my everyday life. Without the least bit of bitterness toward this change, or the little boy that is bringing it about, I just have an awareness of the upcoming season. A new chapter, a new life.

I also trust that God's given me a wonderful, compassionate husband who will help me have those quiet moments at the feet of Jesus... I'm banking on that :)