This is me fed up. Hence the obscene amount of the following caps lock ... sorry.
Fed up with baby books, Google searches, "expert" advice, and generally everything that "worked for another baby".
There's absolutely nothing wrong with James. I have media and information COMING OUT OF MY NOSE and all it does is induce needless worry. Since I found out I was pregnant I have inundated myself with so much stinkin' information and it stops today. Just an example: me thinking he had torticollis. The thought would have never crossed my mind had I not Google searched "baby tends to look only one way". It makes me mad how easily persuaded I am.
Now we're on to sleeping habits. Sentences like, "Babies __ months old need ___ hours of sleep or THEY'LL DIE" literally haunt me at night ... while James is sound asleep in his crib. I've read Ezzo, Ferber (yuck), Sears, Pantley, Weissbluth (like him) and all of them have the magic method, apparently. At that point I begin to feel my brain fizzle. And then I think of the Prairie People.
Ahh, the Prairie People.
Our pioneer women and men who raised their babies with, What?! No BabyCenter.com?? No Milestone Trackers to make sure their little one was NORMAL?? Sure, they had a much higher infant mortality rate, but just go with me on this. I'm so thankful for scientists and research in child development, I really am (it's sort of my job). But right now, FOR MY SANITY, I have to put that on the back burner. I don't think any of these things are bad, just bad for me right now. Everything is just too darn conflicting.
For now, I'm plenty happy with my family, the few professionals that I know, our doctor, my husband, and prayer for Godly wisdom.
For now, I'm just going to take a deep breath and be James' momma.
9 comments:
yesssssss!! i loveth thee!
You're such a smart cookie, Sara! Back when Charlie used to never sleep, and it seemed he was perpetually angry, I tried and read EVERYTHING. How awful it felt everytime I tried something new and it failed miserably. Why couldn't that be the magic 'cure?' Why was my baby the one who didn't respond at all? Eventually everything just sort of worked itself out, with no real answers, but we've been riding the 'go with the flow' wave ever since! There's not always a reason, or a response, for everything.
The only time I ever really used my baby book was when Bree got her first cold, and I wanted to know what I needed to do to get her better. Surprisingly, if I had listened to my Maternal Instincts in the first place...I could have figured it out on my own. I think that's what mother's need to do anyhow. Use their instincts.
The whole "looking one way thing" may be because babies can't see very far or very clearly. Bree used to stare straight up and Paul always feared she was blind.
You are a wise Momma!
Do I still get to see you guys? Next weekend?
Seriously? Are you bosom friend or what? You totally think like me.
When I get overwhelmed with info...and advice...and I feel like the worst mother ever...I think about the prarie people too!
The day I gave up and enjoy enjoyed what I had, nothing changed ecept my heart and my frustration. Barclay still nurses several times a night and I'm just going to be ok with that:-) More time with my sweet son. And I can eat more cake;-) (the extra calories I'm burning...lol)
Good for you Sara. There is just so much out their that it is totally overwhelming, especially for a first-time mom. And everyone says THEY have the right answer. Just take what you can use and what is helpful for James and move on. I'm proud of you!
We found what works for us and I refuse to read much else. Even when my mother-in-law searches the internet for hours on end to solve all our baby problems and comes back with crazy diseases that each one of my children MUST have, HA!
Ya'll are doing a good job. Just remember that God gave you James. He must believe you can take care of him and YOU know what's best for him=)
Good for you, Sara! God did, after all, choose you specifically to be James' Mommy... that means He knew you would know best! And, as I tell my children, "When God decided it was time for me to have a baby, He looked out over all the babies and said, 'Now which one would be best for Mommy Joeli? Ahh... this one right here!" :) You are doing good! And the fact that you have decided to just take a deep breath and be James' Mommy means you are heading in EXACTLY the right direction! Many blessings to you and your boys!
Love this....I drive myself crazy sometimes...there is no one right method to do it, God gave us husbands for a reason and they should be the ones to guide our lives and our babies lives.
I'm so glad I scrolled down to read this older post. I love it! You are absolutely right! God did not include a manual in the placenta because we are to use our discernment, wise counsel, and common sense along with an absolute dependence on the Lord...too much information makes us think we have some kind of self-assurance or adequacy, when really, parenting and mothering is a moment by moment display of desperation for God's grace!
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